Despite increasing awareness, the reality is that many adults with ADHD remain undiagnosed or discover their diagnosis far too late. If you’re someone who went years without understanding why life felt so challenging, you’re not alone. Historically, ADHD was seen as a childhood disorder, so only in recent years have healthcare providers started to understand its persistence into adulthood.
I would have been one of the earlier adults diagnosed in Ireland back in 2013, when awareness was much lower and demand on services was not what it is today. While the diagnosis gave me answers, it wouldn't be until years later that I finally got to know what living with ADHD required, coming to peace with it and moving on in a new way.
The "ADHD Is for Kids" Mindset
One of the biggest reasons for late diagnoses in adults is the persistent idea that ADHD is only a childhood disorder. As a result, adults often present with conditions like anxiety or depression instead. These diagnoses may be partly accurate, but without recognising ADHD as a core issue, treatment is limited, often addressing symptoms rather than the root cause. It’s not unusual to meet adults who’ve seen multiple mental health professionals over the years without an ADHD evaluation ever being suggested, despite the hallmark and persistent symptoms of the condition being omnipresent.
When ADHD Hides Behind Other Conditions
ADHD often coexists with conditions like anxiety and depression, and this overlap can make it difficult to identify ADHD. The complex web of symptoms can blur lines: is someone forgetful because they’re anxious or because they have ADHD? Unfortunately, when one condition is prioritised over another, healthcare professionals may stop investigating, thinking they’ve solved the problem. Treating anxiety or depression alone might bring partial relief, but without addressing the underlying ADHD, the full picture is missed.
Misunderstanding Adult ADHD
It’s also common for healthcare professionals to lack familiarity with how ADHD appears in adults. Some may assume that everyone with ADHD has noticeable hyperactivity, much like the classic restless child. This leaves out people who experience ADHD primarily as inattentiveness or executive dysfunction. A professional unfamiliar with ADHD might conclude that a successful adult can’t possibly have it. But success often comes at a high personal cost for adults with undiagnosed ADHD, who may achieve but suffer from constant stress, burnout, and a sense of not measuring up.
Success Until the System Changes
Some adults with ADHD can manage quite well, until life throws a curveball. Promotions, job changes, marriage, or the birth of children can expose ADHD-related challenges in new ways. Even structured environments, like school or the college, may mask ADHD struggles, only for them to become obvious when that structure disappears. Life transitions such as these often reveal the need for ADHD diagnosis and support, even in highly successful individuals.
Alternative Explanations for Obvious Symptoms
Even when symptoms are obvious, ADHD is sometimes dismissed as something else: “He just needs to try harder” or “She’s going through a phase.” Particularly in the past, ADHD diagnoses were rare unless a child displayed severe hyperactivity. This lack of awareness carried over to children who were undiagnosed and untreated, leaving adults to assume that their struggles were character flaws or a lack of self-discipline rather than signs of ADHD.
This becomes even more complex when a parent also has undiagnosed ADHD, potentially normalising the child’s behaviour as “just the way things are.”
“Everyone Has a Little ADHD These Days"
A growing misconception is that everyone is "a little ADHD" because of our increasingly distracted lives. This oversimplification can make people dismiss the real struggles of ADHD, assuming that the forgetfulness or financial issues of someone with ADHD are just more exaggerated versions of what everyone experiences. In reality, ADHD symptoms are not just "a little extra distraction", they create ongoing challenges that interfere with daily life, relationships, and work in ways that non-ADHD individuals simply couldn't imagine.
Looking Ahead: A Better Understanding of ADHD in Adults
For many adults, an ADHD diagnosis later in life provides long-sought validation and clarity. Although we’re seeing strides being made in understanding and diagnosing ADHD in adults, much work remains. Normalising ADHD assessments and increasing education around adult symptoms can help more people find the support they need sooner rather than later.
Moving Ahead with an Adult ADHD Diagnosis
Many who are diagnosed and begin treatment for ADHD often have an initial rush of relief, finally, an answer. However, things can falter after the initial period without engaging in an honest and self-reflective process on what you're truly dealing with. It is crucial that you learn about ADHD, get a full grasp of what the condition is beyond the obvious manifestations that may arise. By building awareness, you can begin to understand how you might operate differently and to know when to avoid certain situations or simply outsource or avoid them. There are various evidence-based modalities of help available, one of which is ADHD Coaching.
Certified ADHD coaching, which takes a non-judgemental and positive psychology approach to understanding living and managing life wired this way, can offer significant value for adults who receive a later-in-life diagnosis. In particular to adults who are simply fed up with constantly ending up down the same rabbit holes and are open to framing ADHD as an issue of improving their performance in different areas, with support and want to begin to understand and manage their ADHD in a practical, sustainable way. After years of working around unrecognised ADHD, people often quickly benefit immensely from a structured, ADHD-friendly, approach that transforms disorganisation and overwhelm into a self-owned process of figuring out how you might act differently, living a life that fits for you. I was a decade into my own diagnosis before engaging this way, after several failed attempts of getting into a state of action on any consistent basis.
ADHD Coaching guides clients to develop their own understanding and personalised systems for time management, organisation, and focus, while also improving productivity and reducing stress in both work and personal settings. Importantly, ADHD coaching supports clients in reframing self-criticism, fostering a more compassionate perspective on past struggles, and unlocking strengths that may have gone unnoticed. With professional guidance, late-diagnosed adults can create actionable plans and develop lifelong skills, leading to greater confidence, efficiency, and overall quality of life.
